BLAHG, BLAHG, BLAHG!!!

It all began with a broom in Boston. Feddie Spaghetti was sweeping the sidewalk as he usually does when he said, "I love my broom!  It reminds me of that guy on tv that says, 'I love my blender', ha, ha... The thing is I know how to use a broom because when I was a kid, if I didn't do it right, my Mama would tear my ass up!  God knows I love my broom.  He was teaching me... You know?  I don't know what he was teaching me, but if I didn't do it right my Mama would whip my ass" "It must have been a foreshadowing of things to come", I said. "Huh", Feddie responded. "A foreshadowing... God knew one day you would be in front of this Subway.  So, he taught you how to use a broom". "Oh, yeah, a foreshadowing... Haha" Meanwhile, Feddie continued to sweep, as I continued with a cotton swab in my ear.  These are things you would normally do in the morning, in the comfort of your own home, but since I don't have a...

The time has come! A couple of months ago, I got the last slot on this tour and its first ever visit to Athens. The recorded stories are broadcasting on WUGA now, every Friday and Sunday. I'm not sure of the schedule, but I received a link to my session and will be distributing it myself as well. Listen in for local stories from a few Athens, GA characters, including my own! My partner was not able to make it. So, they interviewed me themselves. I haven't listened to it yet, but from the experience, I'd say it was true to form. And, remember... Don't be afraid to put fruit in your grits! StoryCorp Interview 2018 ... For the full line-up, beginning with those currently being aired, visit this link to WUGA: https://www.wuga.org/programs/storycorps-athens-stories

Every now and then, I feel like leaving this town, Athens, GA.  Then, I remind myself, wherever I go I'm still homeless, even though I've convinced myself I'm home wherever I am... As recently as last week, Thanksgiving, I was again facing the same feeling.  After all the job leads from New York and New Jersey, and all the other things like Playboy models who once subscribed to my BLAHG years ago, when I started it, I thought about running away and chasing those glimmers of hope. After my first two subscribers were Playboy models, I seriously considered going to Pacific Palisades, on a shoe string and without a hedonist bone in my body!  The sign on the gate apparently said something like, "If you're not into swingin', then don't come a ringin'".  That just grosses me out.  It was at that point I decided I could never be a Hugh Hefner.  Call me whatever you want, but I'm not ringin' on that gate. So, ever since then, I've lived on...

Being poor is immediately defined as not having any money, but a deeper more sincere definition occurs.  Being of a poor mind is the truly defining characteristic of poverty, a poor spirit is never rich. It's not about having money, or even not having money.  Heck, I've been broke for nearly twelve years now, but I'm not poor!  Being poor is a mindset, really.  But, over the years, I have truly been able to be around truly poor people.  In hindsight, I see now, even before my life on the streets, I knew poor people before who had lots of stuff! Truly poor people get stuck in a way of doing things and never seek change.  There is a certain sense of security in being poor and constantly surrounding yourself with others who maybe, speak just like you.  Poor people definitely have a way of speaking. On that note, I have compiled a list of the top ten characteristics, or traits of being poor! ... Traits of Poor People Trait Number 1: Poor peop...

Facebook keeps serving up posts from two, or three years ago that are actually posts from 2004, fifteen years ago; now going on sixteen years. I used this doctored up pic for my profile pic. I enhanced it, a SELFIE- one of my few ever taken, because I am really bothered by the whole SELFIE thing. Before SELFIES, people used to engage someone on the street to get them to take a picture for them. It was a social engagement we seem to have lost. Yes, there are plenty of freaks out there, but I don't think there are really anymore than ever before. It's just that with the immediacy by which we receive information now, we see more of them than ever before. Freaks have always been here, and to some degree, we're all freaks. Dolly Parton counts herself as a freak and loves freaks. After all, this is not a theocracy, and it never has been a theocracy. Therefore, we have all these Dolly Parton fans running around who love to dress up as her! I'm not one of thos...

Synchronicity is something you experience in life, and might often just write it off as coincidence.  But, when things happen so often, and seem to defy the odds entirely, it's hard to write things off to chance.  For instance, on Friday of last week I was sitting downtown when a woman I hadn't seen in over a year was walking.  She said, "Hey Gabe!  How are you doing?" I was not in a very jovial mood, I gotta admit.  My father recently told me that my biggest problem in life was that I wasn't very good at tolerating bullsh*t.  I, in total agreement, said with a HA, "You just hit the nail on the head Pops". Then, she asked, "Where are you working", and that's what was making me blue. Being stuck on the streets in a college town for twelve years, and having worked several jobs that don't pay enough to provide a standard of living, I had just walked out on another one due to some major bullsh*t.  My background is primarily Advertisin...

It is scandalous we have people on the streets of America.  It is scandalous we have people stealing from street people.  It is scandalous to disturb the peace with GRITS! Regardless, of how many homeless people there are in America, there are too many.  A day in the life of a street person begins around 5:30, or 6:00am.  The first thing one has to do is find a bathroom.  Imagine that, if you will. Then, if you're fortunate enough to be poor in America, you wait for breakfast which is served after 8:00am.  Between waking up, taking a crap, and eating breakfast, you might smoke, or some just go ahead and start drinking, and never go to breakfast.  The beer store opens at 7am. However, on any given Saturday morning, you might find yourself at the Sparrow's Nest for breakfast.  It's usually really good.  You listen to a short sermon and then breakfast is served. Now, mind you, I spent a great portion of my life living in a BLUR!  I ...