Skip to main content

Morning Sex In The Parking Deck

I've had many jobs in life.  If you've read my BLAHGS, or heard me talk about it.  You know I created myself an imaginary job while spending six months in the Plantation County jail.  See, the way I figured it, I might as well do something with my time.  So, I appointed myself the National Director of the White House Auxilliary Task Force (WHATF for short) on how to fund health care for the poor through a sugar tax...  I know, crazy, right?

But, another job I once had, once upon a time, was working in a parking deck, also in Plantation County.  Part of my responsibility was to keep the parking deck cleaned up. What do a bra, a pair of panties, a bag of tortilla chips, and a cup of coffee have in common? These are all things I found in the parking deck on one particular memorable morning!!  Oh, and don't forget the spent condom! Thank God for brooms and dust pans!

You just never know what you're going to find in a parking deck! One day I found a full case of various craft beers, and a fifth of unopened cinnamon whiskey chilled to a crisp 40 degrees as the weather had been cool. Another day, as I was checking the trash bins I looked in to see how full one was and I saw what I thought was money, and it was; fifty-four dollars to be exact! These are good finds!  It really pays to take out the trash!

So, I submit this rhyme to you now, as inspired by... well, trash.



Morning Sex In The Parking Deck


Morning sex in the parking deck, starts around 2am.  
Sex in the elevators, sex in the stairs, 
Sex in the cars, sex in the bars, 
Sex on the escalator... 
Wait, that would hurt. 
Don't have sex on escalators. 
It just won't work. 
Sex in the bathroom,
Sex on the patio, 
Sex in the streets, 
Sex, just, can't be, beat! 
But, does anybody just have sex in the bedroom anymore?  
You bunch of parking deck sex perps!  
Morning sex in the parking deck, 
It's a trend, I swear to you, 
An epidemic in fact!  
It's hard to grasp, 
But, morning sex in the parking deck 
Can never really last... 
Because as soon as you think it can,
Those elevator doors open,
And now you have fans, 
But you still have to pull up your pants!
That all leads me to this...

http://gabenewmanblahgs.blogspot.com/2016/05/jail-house-dreams.html

Hawaii 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Films, Motion Pictures & MOVIES!

Immediately, by my use of the term "movies", you know I am not a Film Snob.  I also did not grow up in the era before "movies".  Even as I write this, Blogger is questioning my use of the term by underlining it with a red squiggly line, but that's what I call them, movies!  So, sue me if you don't like it. People used to only see celebrities in still shots printed in magazines before the age of television.  Then, they would go see them at the "movie theater", after hearing about it on the radio.  Nobody ever called them Film Theatres, did they?  The word "film" is really a description of the medium by which we are enabled to view "movies" rather than it being a description of the experience of watching still pictures transformed into motion.  So, I'm sticking with "movies", but I am not opposed to calling them motion pictures.  For the "purists" out there that insist on using the word "film&qu
Post a Comment
Read more

Stacey Dash On "Why I Say What I Say"

Why I Say What I Say, Even Though I Drive Whoopi, BET, and Most Other Black People Crazy ... After reading the article above, here are my thoughts... Stacey Dash drives me crazy, and I'm not even BLACK!  She having grown up in the South Bronx, having voted for Obama in 2008, and now a right wing representative of the most extreme kind, I agree with her much of the time, but she sticks to the script when she knows it is WRONG.  I'm not really disagreeing with this current post, except in terms of the way Republicans always attack social programs when working on the budget before they attack our inflated military budget.  I'm all for a strong defense.  I'm not a pacifist in that way, but we don't spend the money on our weapons program for the people of this country as much as we spend it for the people making money off it.  Sure, we need reforms in the welfare system, but not cuts, at least not yet. I can't argue with anything Stacey Dash has said in this art
Post a Comment
Read more

Wrong About Irene

Well, as Irene continues its way up the eastern seaboard, Georgia has been spared from any devastation although it was very humid today; that’s not devastating.  That’s par for the course in Georgia.  At least, that has been par for the course most of the time I have lived in this beautiful state.  Yet, the previous ten years have been moderate in terms of the humidity factor.  So, this recent humidic return in the last couple of years has restored and reminded us of the fact that this beautiful state, as lush and green as it is, is right next door to Florida, the arm pit of the South.  And Irene brought a piece of Florida with her and left in Georgia.  A soggy statement that can only stimulate thanksgiving. My first year of college, I was seeing this girl who had to write a paper on the topic of “The Optimism of Pessimism”.  I suppose, I am writing the same paper write now, only I won’t receive a grade. She said to me, ‘I received a topic for a paper today and I’m
Post a Comment
Read more